053: what made you cry? 9 strangers, 9 stories from our first wellness pop-up
This week, we ventured beyond the recording studio and into the real world for our very first brb crying pop-up at a local wellness event.
Armed with one simple question—"what made you cry?"—we invited fellow vendors and attendees to share the stories that have been living in their hearts. What followed were nine honest conversations about grief, healing, identity, creativity, parenthood, entrepreneurship, self-worth, showing ourselves grace, and the people who change our lives. Along the way, we got to spotlight incredible local small businesses doing meaningful work in their communities.
This episode is a reminder that everyone has a story worth sharing; sometimes all it takes is one question (and maybe a bit of heckling) to uncover it.
Content note: this episode includes conversations about grief, loss, and past trauma.
In this episode:
vulnerability & emotional storytelling
wellness, healing & community
small business owners & creative journeys
grief, love & personal growth
mental health & self-discovery
what strangers can teach us about being human
Chapters:
0:00 - Preview
1:56 - Show us some love by writing us a review <3
6:05 - Introducing our first live podcast event
9:39 - Tess the jewelry maker finds healing through crystals
13:31 - Alex the baker is happy to be alive
17:18 - Jacob cries over a serious Steve Carrell
19:26 - Neetal the social impact author moves through grief
22:53 - Joy the yoga instructor feels seen by her kids
26:48 - Chay the therapist holds space for people who look like her
34:36 - Lilyanna lives in the present and loves herself first
39:00 - Alexa the artist cries about coaching tee ball
42:49 - Jem the doula is an open channel for emotions
49:16 - Outro
Referenced in this episode:
GAC Wellness Market organized by Gymparty
Tess from Elevated Gemstones (@elevatedgemstones)
Alex from Chipidee Cookies (@chipideecookies)
Beautiful Boy (2018) starring Steve Carell and Timothée Chalamet
Neetal from Innov8social & Pineapple Friends Children's Books(@pineapplefriendsbooks)
Joy the yoga instructor (@joykarakas)
Chay (@chayteatherapy) from Reconnected Mental Health and Therapin*y
Someone Great (2019) starring Gina Rodriguez
Alexa from Kurated Kultura (@kuratedkultura & @forlittlealexa)
Jem from Birth of the Divine (@birthofthedivine)
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Speaker: 00:00
It's okay to cry like when that when that emotion overcomes, but you won't drown in your tears. You will find a way to swim through them.
Speaker 2: 00:08
Okay, so Steve Carell, also a favorite. Did you know he's on the office? Yeah. Have you heard?
Speaker 8: 00:14
No! I had such a spiritual experience. I literally nonstop was crying.
Speaker 6: 00:24
Like, I well, okay, the other day. Okay, here we go. There's more fun. Here we go.
unknown: 00:30
Here we go.
Speaker 2: 00:32
This is BRB Crying.
Speaker 3: 00:44
Hello everyone, and welcome to BRB Crying. I'm Arns.
Speaker 2: 00:48
And I'm Nins. And yes, this is a podcast called BRB Crying. But I think today we could also call it the Super Bowl. Oh. Because we have a very fun episode for you all today. Yeah. We got something special up our sleeves. We always do. We're always just like filled with like things for you guys. I feel like we are annoyingly starting to be like special episodes every single time. Every one. But they are. But they are. Everything we do is special, magical, wonderful, viral. For those of you that are new here, we are a podcast where we talk about any and all things that make us cry. Sounds heavy. It's actually hilarious. Yes. Cozy comedy. Cozy comedy. Um we do get into the feels a little bit, but um it's just part of the magic.
Speaker 3: 01:50
If you are new here, welcome. If you're old here, welcome back, Crybaby. Love to have
Speaker 3: 01:56
you. If you don't already You know what? Let me let me start with this.
Speaker 2: 02:01
What the fuck are you doing right now? I because I am trying.
Speaker 3: 02:07
I don't know how to formulate this in a way that doesn't sound like I am reprimanding. Oh, I'll do it. But what the fuck are you doing? My god, people, please, please, if you have not yet found the 0.1 seconds that it takes to do this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. We get thousands of listeners a month. We have 36 reviews out of this recording.
Speaker 2: 02:30
We can do a little better than that. I know, I know. And if we sound angry, we rate, actually. Yes, yes, yes. There is a little bit of that there. But really, really at the heart of it, it is really just us wanting to get some exposure to our podcast that I know has moved all of you listening connected with what we have to say, and we are just really hoping you'll help us out in spreading the word and getting us to the top of those fucking featured lists again.
Speaker 3: 03:06
If you have connected with us even a little bit, it really just takes a second, and it does a whole lot of good for an indie pod like us.
Speaker 2: 03:16
So we're like so Indian cool.
Speaker 3: 03:18
We're on the verge of not being indie, so get in on so Indian cool.
Speaker 2: 03:23
And if you want proof that you were here early, lock in, babe. Lock the fuck in. Do it right now. And also, we love you. Thank you. Thanks for letting us yell at you.
Speaker 3: 03:34
Have I mentioned how much I appreciate you as a listener? So yeah. Uh and if you haven't followed us yet, we are at VRBCrying.podcast on all socials. Give us a follow. And also if you leave us a review and you live in the United States, uh, we will mail you a sticker for free. And we sell these stickers online. So just as a little thank you. Just a little thank you. We'll give you our really, really, really cute sticker. And if you also rate us on Spotify, we may throw in an extra sticker. Up to you. Up to you.
Speaker 2: 04:08
Alright. Have you ranted long enough? Okay. How the fuck are you?
Speaker 3: 04:12
I'm good. I mean, I do have a raging headache, really. Yeah. But it's it's fine. Yeah. We're hanging in there.
Speaker 2: 04:20
Yeah. Yeah. How are you? Good. I'm um I'm just so exhausted from all the hosting I've been doing lately. Big update for me. I just moved into a new place. And so it's gorgeous, it's stunning. Um teaser for next episode? I don't know. But uh yeah, so I've just been having a lot of friends and family come and visit so I can show off how nice my new place is. Yeah, of course. And I'm hostess with mostis. Virgo rising. I'm doing it all. I'm doing it all. So um I had people come over both on Saturday and Sunday. You and our girlfriends came over on Saturday. And um that was a lot of fun. I had an amazing time. Yeah. Love the new place. Thank you. Thank you. I feel like for the last like couple of weeks, maybe even months, we've just been really, really busy doing like fun podcast stuff. But it's just been so long since we've just soaked in the presence of our girls. I felt like we were all like grooming with updates and we couldn't really like fit in everything in that short amount of time, even though you guys were there for hours. But not enough time. Not enough time. So we gotta do it again. I'll host it. Yeah, that's what I got.
Speaker 3: 05:37
I guess I should probably could have led with what we're doing today for this special episode.
Speaker 2: 05:41
But I mean, I'll get into it now. I mean, any opportunity for me to just be like my place is really nice. I'm a great host. I have lots of friends and family who care about me. Um take the time.
Speaker 3: 05:53
You should. You should. And now I'm going to talk about it. I could say I think we're good. Okay, so today for our special episode, this is my smooth transition.
Speaker 3: 06:05
We are doing something we have never done before. Well, let's backtrack. In May, we went to a wellness event as a vendor. This was our first time ever being a vendor somewhere to this extent because what we did Cry Babies was set up a little cozy campfire where we had a sign that said, Tell us what made you cry, and get featured on our podcast. And we the way we heckled the people who walked through that quad. This was a wellness event, by the way, so they were expecting vendors, but I don't know if they were necessarily expecting two girly pops with the the whole ass setup. But we had our camera, we had our little our little mics, and we got some maybe eight, ten, I don't know, people who were willing to share with us something that made them cry. And a lot of the people who joined us were actually fellow vendors. And I realize it's because the typical passerby is actually kind of shy to be on camera versus people who have businesses, they're familiar with promoting themselves and being a little bit more on camera. But we did get a couple of trays. So we are threading all of those interviews into one long. So the Super Bowl, I told you. The Super Ball and Super Ball is particularly fitting because this was actually at the campus where the 49ers HQ is. So lots of people walking through there, working for the 49ers.
Speaker 2: 07:49
It was so funny when harassing people and just like, you know, just like chasing you down. Which I think if I was on the receiving end, I would be horrified. But it was so what I meant to say was it was so funny when we would ask people if they had anything to share. And of course, the immediate reaction is no, like I don't know what I would say. I don't have anything to offer. I know, but just within minutes of us sitting down and talking to them, we heard the most beautiful, profound, hilarious stories. Everyone has a story to share. And we are so happy and honored to offer even a glimpse of that for all of our listeners today.
Speaker 3: 08:42
Yeah. It was magical. It was. I loved it. My phone was on 1% at the end of it. You didn't bring an extra charger?
Speaker 2: 08:54
No. Lesson learned, lesson learned. Yeah, lesson learned. Next time.
Speaker 3: 08:58
Um yeah, it was it was so fun and we're so magnetic that like everyone just like wanted to keep talking. No, but truly, it was I was crying. I cried multiple times. Yeah. 80 degrees outside, sitting in the sun, music blasting. Yeah. We're getting into grief, we're getting into drama. I mean, we're getting into just fun um movie suggestions. It runs the full gamut. So really excited about this one.
Speaker 2: 09:24
Here on the spot, we are just trying to offer a safe space for everyone to just share what the fuck they want to share. So, without further ado, here we go.
Speaker 2: 09:39
Alright, so we have our first guest here. Could you introduce us to yourself?
Speaker 8: 09:45
Hi, I'm Tess from Elevated Gemstones. Uh, we sell crystals, jewelry, um, Filipino and Hawaiian and Asian-inspired jewelry.
Speaker 2: 09:56
So I was talking to her and I said, you know what? I don't know anything about gemstones. And she goes, Well, and then she told me how she got into it, and it was an incredible story. She wanna show a little bit.
Speaker 8: 10:10
Basically, a few years ago, um I didn't know anything about gemstones, and my brother-in-law and sister-in-law brought me to this uh crystal shop at Tahoe. Okay, Tahoe. Love Tahoe. So the first rock that my brother-in-law told me to hold was a moldavite. Well, I had such a spiritual experience. I literally nonstop was crying. Like right when you just when I held the oh my god, and I was like, what is this? You know, because like I heard about crystals, but I didn't really, I didn't know much about them. So after that I was hooked. Fast forward a couple years later, I get in a three-car accident.
unknown: 10:56
Oh my god.
Speaker 8: 10:57
And of course, I had brain trauma, and um they were giving me a lot of medication. So I did a deep dive into like spiritual healing, yeah, crystals. So I went, I kind of reverted back to crystals, and even though it wasn't um, I guess uh a true fix to what I was feeling in a temporary fix, it literally helped me. Like for the anxiousness, the headaches. Yeah, so that's how I kind of got turned on to the crystals.
Speaker 2: 11:27
She was mentioning earlier in our little chat that the power of crystals really does rely on what you believe is possible. It's really about you know, do you believe this thing can heal you? Then it will heal you, which I think is really incredible.
Speaker 8: 11:42
Just the power of your mind and how that crystal will bring that out in you. And it's just like anything, you you have to open up your mind to other ways of healing, learning, yeah. Um, and I I I guess I was just so open to just understanding about it and actually learning about it. It helped me, yeah. And I I really go based on my brand. Like, I I would not sell if I don't believe in it. So they did help me. It's a temporary fix, but it does give a temporary healing at the time that you need the most.
Speaker 2: 12:14
For our listeners that aren't as knowledgeable about moldavite, can you share first of all what it is, what it does, and what you were feeling when you were holding it for the first time?
Speaker 8: 12:25
So the moldavite is actually a meteor that falls from the earth, right? Okay, and a lot of them um in the spiritual community they believe that it has some kind of spiritual power. I didn't know nothing about it. I didn't believe in it. I was like, really? What is this? You know, but when I touched it, I literally could not stop crying. And this went on for at least a good 30 minutes. Wow. That's how profound it was. Did you even know why you were crying or you just felt this release of energy? The release of energy, just probably making past trauma, just just calm out. And I'm a very reserved person, so for me to feel that, I said, wow, this is something special, you know. Um and yeah, that's that's one of the stories.
Speaker 2: 13:10
That's thank you so much for sharing with us. Thank you. Um, could you tell our listeners where we could find you and your shop?
Speaker 8: 13:17
Yeah, so follow us on Elevated Gemstones um on Instagram. Thank you so much, Tess. Thank you.
Speaker 3: 13:31
Alright, welcome to BRB Crying.
Speaker 5: 13:34
Thank you guys for having me. I'm so excited to be here.
Speaker 3: 13:37
So tell us a little bit about who you are and what made you cry.
Speaker 5: 13:40
So my name is Alex. I am a small home baker based in San Jose, California. My whole thing is to put a cookie in every hand that puts a smile on every face. Because cookies at the end of the day are make me happy, and so that's why I just want to spread this world. Um, so yeah, going back to your question, what made me cry last night? I was randomly browsing through Instagram, as everyone does in the evening, and there was this woman who was just smiling, so bright, and she was just spewing the most simple phrases of I am so grateful, I am so happy to be here, I love that I'm happy today, I love that I'm confident today. Yeah, and it was so random because it hit me to the heart in the most unexpected way.
Speaker 3: 14:33
Yeah.
Speaker 5: 14:34
And I realized I never had that kind of confidence growing up. Uh I never had that kind of confidence to assure me of uh who I was as a person, and I'm just so happy to see people publicly say it out loud. Yeah. Because I would never want that kind of self-doubt to creep on anybody, especially this next generation. So her just announcing it to the world so proudly and embracing it, I was happy to be happy. Yeah. Oh. And uh that was the first time I really experienced these sort of happy tears. Happy cry, yeah, yeah. Like, I'm not a happy crier, but this is probably my first happy cry.
Speaker 2: 15:16
Yeah. And I love that what you said was that her sentences were so simple. I'm happy to be alive. I'm happy to be here. Isn't it just all that simple when you think about it?
Speaker 5: 15:26
And it's so crazy because we overcomplicate our lives on what happiness could be. 100% when just breathing, just walking is all we kind of really need at the end of the day. You know, we can't we can't materialize a happiness. We can't put a price to it because just having our everyday experiences making us us, that is what we have to be proud about in our lives. So, yeah, being proud of who you are, being proud of how you look no matter what. Yeah, that's what you have to be happy about.
Speaker 3: 15:56
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love that. And you let yourself just cry. Like you let the emotions come over you, yeah.
Speaker 5: 16:03
It just, I literally had to like grab a tissue box because I was like, what is going on here? Like patting my face, sniffling in the nose. It was it was crazy. It was really a crazy experience. So, you guys having these questions to me, I was like, this is kind of on brand right now.
Speaker 2: 16:20
I'm so grateful to finally get a chance to talk to you. I've seen you at so many events, but you seem so genuine, so authentic, and I'm sure that's the love that you put in every single cookie that you bake.
Speaker 5: 16:29
Thank you so much. It really is. And you know, people always ask me, like, what does chippity mean?
Speaker 2: 16:33
Yeah.
Speaker 5: 16:33
And I'm like, honestly, it's a nonsensical term, but what it needed to be was something that connoted happiness, appreciation, and gratitude because at the end of the day, that's what a cookie is to me. Yeah, like when someone bakes you something, or if you're having a good day or a bad day, bake good kind of just makes it better. Oh my god. So that's what chippity, you know, in its essence means.
Speaker 3: 16:55
So where can people find you?
Speaker 5: 16:57
Uh they can find me on Instagram at trippitycookies.com. I'm a small home bakery in San Jose. Just go to our website, you'll see all our pop-ups, or you order directly from me, and I bake everything fresh. Crazy!
Speaker 3: 17:08
Amazing. Thank you. Thank you guys for having me again.
Speaker 2: 17:18
Okay, could you tell us your name?
Speaker 1: 17:20
Yeah, my name's Jacob. Awesome. Yeah.
Speaker 2: 17:23
Nice to meet you, Jacob.
Speaker 1: 17:24
Nice to meet you guys too.
Speaker 2: 17:26
So Jacob has a movie here to share with us. The thing that made him cry.
Speaker 1: 17:30
Yeah, so the last movie, first of all, I watch a lot of movies, so love, love a good like movie night. Um, but the movie that made me cry last was Beautiful Boy, the one Timothy Chalamet and Steve Carell.
Speaker 2: 17:41
I've heard of it. I'm so scared to watch I didn't see that movie.
Speaker 1: 17:44
Yeah, it's intense, especially like if you have any like family members or friends that had history with like mental health or like drug abuse. Yeah. It's intense. Um, but two of my favorite actors and seeing them in that like sort of dynamic was awesome. Like they did a great job portraying it, and I felt stuffed. So yeah, I definitely felt stuffed.
Speaker 2: 18:04
We love Timothy Chalamet on the potential. That's the two. I love him.
Speaker 1: 18:09
I've been eating up like the Timothy Nick's content recently with him and I actually think they're really cute together. Yeah, they're super cute together.
Speaker 2: 18:16
Also, his new haircut.
Speaker 1: 18:18
So you didn't like the mustache?
Speaker 2: 18:20
I you know what, we love him regardless what the hair is, but it's just a nice touch of a clean face.
Speaker 1: 18:28
I know what you mean. Yeah, yeah. He um he went from like, you know, 30 to 21 overnight, though.
Speaker 4: 18:34
Two months doing that too.
Speaker 2: 18:36
Okay, so Steve Carell, also a favorite. Did you know he's on the office?
Speaker 1: 18:45
No, I love The Office. It's why he's my favorite. He's amazing. It was Michael Scott, is so funny. But no, just him in a serious role, like in a series. I'm just gonna say the flip is awesome to watch. Yeah, yeah. So the fact that he can do both sides of the spectrum just goes to show how great of an actor he is. Yeah, and evoke emotions out of the audience, which is why I watch in movies.
Speaker 2: 19:07
And even those rare moments on the office where he does have some like character development, it really hits you hard. It just shows how great of an actor he is.
Speaker 1: 19:16
1000%. Cool.
Speaker 2: 19:17
Well, thank you so much.
Speaker 1: 19:18
Yeah, thanks for having me, guys. Yeah, that was fun.
Speaker 3: 19:27
Okay, so welcome to Beer Be Crying. Do you want to tell us a little bit about yourself and why you cried?
Speaker: 19:34
Uh yeah, so my name is Nepal Parek. I'm the founder of Innovate Social and um my creator of Pineapple Friends books which we have at the event today. Um, you know, one of the things I feel has really marked my life is grief. I um it's been actually 20 years in June since we lost our mom. And I I'm really glad that you have this space because grief really does come in waves and cycles. And I think um, like I want to share this now because I think in 20 years ago we didn't know how we'd always get through the day with that loss. And now it's a different kind of grief that sometimes is like like far away, like where even now Mother's Days are can be tough, but I almost feel like that's a day for other people to celebrate, like like it's the it's their day to celebrate their mom, like you know, and so it's no longer that that stinging pain, but there can be a moment when all of that comes back, and it can be um, I think there was once recently where I just had this like kind of happy thought, and I was like, I'm gonna call my mom, and it's been 20 years, but that you have to explain that to your mind that that is not possible is a little bit tough. But um, but yeah, I I guess I would just say I for the person version of myself 20 years ago, if you have gone through a really tough loss and it's been recent, just know that you can just take it a day at a time, and that grief will change, and you can live with them with energy and spirit of that person, so they'll always be close to your heart, and it's okay to cry like when that when that emotion overcomes, but it doesn't have to you won't drown in your tears, you will find a way to swim through them. So that would be the thing that I would say. So beautiful.
Speaker 2: 21:13
We always we always say that grief is just love with nowhere to go. Your love book for her will always be.
Speaker: 21:19
Yeah, yes.
Speaker 2: 21:20
Could you tell us her name that yes you love asked about her?
Speaker: 21:23
Yes, Funita Parek was my is my mom, and um she they called her the Indian Martha Stewart. She loved she loved hosting, entertaining. She was like the matriarch in our family, and so um my sister has like a lot of her skills. I have some of them, I see some of her colleagues and my brother. So I think we all kind of little, you know, but I think that when I think about how much she like loved living and loved coasting, and it's a very beautiful kind of thought that's very like buoyant. So yeah.
Speaker 8: 21:53
She sounds like an incredible person. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: 21:56
So maybe we're glad with the time that we had, and and maybe that's what you feel. As time goes by, you feel grateful because we meet so many people that we don't necessarily have a long-term connection, but we're so lucky for the people that we got to really get to know and spend time with. Thank you so much. Thank you. This is such a beautiful conversation.
Speaker 3: 22:15
Do you want to tell us where people can find you? Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: 22:17
So what you're working on now? Yeah, so we, you know, one of the things inspired by my nephews was to create um books that really um support social emotional learning and problem solving in young learners. So we have the Pineapple Friends Books, um, and that's just at pineapplefriends.com or at Pineapple Friends Books on social media. So if that's something that the littles in your life would love, feel free to take a look. And we have lots of other things around social entrepreneurship that you'll find once you get there. So yeah, thank you so much. Really appreciate it. Yeah.
Speaker 2: 22:54
Alright, well, welcome to BRD Crying.
Speaker 11: 22:57
Tell us your name and something that made you cry. I'm Joy. Something that made me cry. Maybe take a moment to just like connect. Let me just take a moment to connect. Lots of moments. Um okay, I think I got it. Okay, okay. Um I think gratitude, just like community, seeing people like like just seeing her like interact with the community just makes me want to cry because it's such a beautiful thing that she's doing. And I think it's something that I would love to contribute to. Um that's one of the things, like gratitude is one of the many things that I practice, and it does make me tear up.
Speaker 7: 23:39
Yeah.
Speaker 11: 23:40
Um Do you have like a gratitude practice that you consciously do like every day, or is it just as it comes? It comes naturally now, but at the beginning it wasn't. It wasn't. I started like um, you know, one of those challenges, like, oh, like one out of 365 days. Or I think mine was just like a month. Like it didn't last, it didn't last. But it it got something started. Yeah. And do you journal or do you just think these thoughts like really? I do journal. Um, not I'm not always consistent with it, but my head hurts. My hand hurts! But once you have that, like, once you get it going, then it'll flow. But yeah, I love journaling. Yeah, it's really good. What is one thing that you've been grateful for lately? My kids and my two kids, presents. They're they're just like they see me in a different light. Like, I feel like sometimes I'm part of myself, and they're just like, you're doing great, mommy. I'm like, are you kidding? Are you kidding me right now?
unknown: 24:41
Oh my god.
Speaker 11: 24:45
Yeah, so my daughter's three, her name is Luna, and she's like, Oh, you're doing great, mommy. I'm like, seriously?
Speaker 6: 24:53
Like, I well, okay, the other day, okay, here we go.
Speaker 11: 24:58
Here we go, there we go, here we go. Um, I was driving her to school, and she goes to like the Montessori school, right? And I forgot to bring her lunch. When I got her when I got to her parking lot, her school parking lot, I forgot her lunch. I turned around, I told Luna, I'm like, Luna, I'm sorry, but I forgot your lunch. She paused for a moment, like 10, 20, 30 seconds, what it seemed like. She thought about it. She's like, it's okay, mommy. Just drop me off and bring it to me later. Like I was not expecting that. I was like, maybe she would get upset. She'd be like, oh, okay, forget my, you know, which is all valid. Yeah. But she was problem solving, you know? She was just thinking of okay, how can I solve this problem? She didn't get upset. So I'm just ungrateful for her.
Speaker 2: 25:47
And it's such a simple solution, right? Because I think our habit is to be like, oh my god, catastrophizing. Yeah, everything is the end of the world. And then she's offering you this sweet, simple solution without being hard on you, without, you know, getting kind. She was really kind, yeah. She's three! And I just want to point out that that is because of what kind of parent you probably are to her.
Speaker 11: 26:09
Thanks for saying that. You guys are sweet.
unknown: 26:11
Yeah.
Speaker 11: 26:12
Thank you so much for sharing with things.
Speaker 4: 26:15
Yeah. That's cute.
Speaker 3: 26:16
Thank you for being here.
Speaker 11: 26:18
Do you want to share with everyone where we can find you online? What you're doing? Yeah, sure. Um, so my Instagram is Joy Caracas, um, and I teach yoga. I'm welcome privately and at corporate and um wherever, different places. Yeah. Um, mindful movement, um, breath work. Oh my god. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 3: 26:48
Okay, welcome to BRB Crying. Thank you for having me.
Speaker 7: 26:53
Can you share who you are and talk about what made you cry? Sure. Uh let's see. So I'm Chai. I am a therapist. Uh, Filipino therapist have my own private practice. Um, and I am working with Therapinae, so representing today our Filipino Wellness Directory for Filipino providers of all kinds, healers, therapists. Um, you know, it's so nice to be involved in the community in that way. Um, and my specialty is in digital wellness, so doing things for people struggling with social media, with the phone, with AI. Um, and so we talk to a lot of people about those things, and I'm working with people who are doing research in those areas. So um, so yeah, I guess I feel like I cry a lot and also sit with people while they cry. Um and I guess I've gone through a lot of grief in the last like three years of my life. I've lost um a best friend, a parent, um, grandparent, uncles, and so there are just a lot of reasons why I have experienced moments in time where it's like I have to express myself in these ways. And crying is something that I don't know, it's it's so important and yet so difficult sometimes to do, especially in our culture where it feels like you know, I was told, you know, with all the good intention by my family not not to cry or like to, you know, okay, like stop now. Yeah, that's enough. Oh my god, yeah. You know, yeah, that's enough now. Yeah, it's like it's like okay, you're crying but like shh stop, stop, stop, right? And so that I think is something as a therapist, as a healer, like I am working through with people and allowing them space to cry. Yeah. Um, and also even with my own family, like now that we've had so many grief experiences, um, allowing us the space to feel our feelings to cry when we need to is so important.
Speaker 3: 29:04
How did you like make that switch? I know that's kind of a big question, but like going from knowing what your cultural background is and what your experience was, like what prompted you to get into like therapy and something that can feel so like you know, counterintuitive in our culture.
Speaker 7: 29:20
Yeah, yeah. Um I was working with kids first and foremost. So I started thinking like, do I want to be a teacher? Do I want to be an educator? And then I kind of moved into school counseling because the kids kept coming to me with their stories, right? Their trauma, the stuff that they were dealing with, or like you know, fighting with their friends, right? So I just found more both that it scared me as well as called me. And so I kept following that intuition that like this is where I'm meant to be. Um, and so then with working with kids, of course, you like meet the families, talking to parents, all of that stuff, and I realized yes, I do really good work with kids, and working with adults is also healing those inner children. Yes. And so I got my license in school counseling, but then also in therapy. Um, and so I decided like I'll do school counseling for a little while, then go into therapy after that. And so yeah, I transitioned into private practice in 2019, and part of the work and part of becoming a therapist really is doing our own healing and learning about ourselves. Yeah. Um, I really don't believe that like a a healer or you know, somebody who does this kind of work can be effective unless they've walked their own journey, right? So um And it's a journey, like a lifelong journey too. It is a lifelong journey. It's I will be on it for the rest of my life. Yeah. Um, but yeah, I found just the most amazing people, and I've been able to witness people in those moments, and I have always been comfortable, more comfortable with my emotions. Um, but it was being able to unlock that and be part of communities or train being trainings that allow me to be in those spaces with you know technical skills, clinical skills that allow me to do that, but then also giving words, vocabulary to things that I think we all know from like very deep ancestral history, from tradition, that sort of thing. So yeah, so that's a little bit of action. Thank you so much for sharing that.
Speaker 3: 31:22
And I feel like uh it's I I love seeing Filipino therapists, it's so important. I I I very intentionally, when I sought out a therapist like four or five years ago, I was like, I would love for her to be like at least like Asian American, like yes, and then so I found someone who was Filipino, and I there was so much I didn't have to explain.
Speaker 7: 31:44
Yes, yes, absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 3: 31:46
It's like it's a huge game changer, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 7: 31:48
And you don't realize how much mental and emotional work that takes, even though it's not like you know, a provider who's not from our culture is well-meaning, and there could be totally things that I learn from other cultures and things like that. And when you're with somebody who gets things that we've been through, words, right? My my clients will just throw in, you know, vocabulary words from like Tagalog or whatever that like or explain like uh an event, yeah, or something like that, or an a situation, and I'm like, I already know.
Speaker 3: 32:20
You don't have to explain it, yeah.
Speaker 7: 32:22
You don't have to like I have seen that or I've experienced it, or I know of it even if it's not my personal experience. And I always try to name as a Filipino therapist, there's such a plethora of experiences within our culture, yeah. Whole like colonization stuff that we could get into, right? But it's nice to be able to just know that you and I have experiences that we can bridge together, right? It doesn't have to be exactly the same. I'm not gonna pretend that I know every single person whose Filipinos experience, but I do have enough foundation to be able to meet them where they need to be met. Yeah. So yeah, yeah, yeah. Clients and everyone you see feel so seen by you. Yes, yes, I really hope so. Yes. Yeah, I I love doing this work. Like it really, I could not be in a better profession, and I hope that more people feel that way. Yeah. So I love that. Thank you so much for sharing.
Speaker 3: 33:16
Do you want to tell everyone where we can find you?
Speaker 7: 33:19
Yes, yes, that'd be great. Um, so my personal website is reconnectedmentalhealth.com. Um, and I also work for therapinai, so it's therapinai.com. If you are looking for a Filipino wellness provider, um that would be where I would look first. Okay, cool. Um what is Therapinae? Yeah, so Therapinae is a directory, and so um, if you're looking, you can always filter it for uh people's specialties, insurance, um, gender, uh different kinds of like Filipino experiences, even so wow. Um yeah, so there there are so many different ways, and it's a unique, it's a unique directory because I don't see a lot of um like websites or or places where you can find not only like therapists and clinicians but also like wellness providers like Hilo and Reiki and Acupuncture, right? Like all of the things on here. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And so um, and it's ethnicity specific, which I don't see a lot of that on in the world, you know? So it's it's a wonderful resource, so I would highly recommend it. And we have wonderful providers. Yeah, so thank you so much. Of course, thank you for having me. I'm so honored.
Speaker 3: 34:36
Welcome to BRB Crying. Thank you.
Speaker 9: 34:39
Do you want to tell us a little bit about who you are and what made you cry? Yeah, so I'm Liliana, and I've looking at the list, I think I want to talk about the movie Someone Great. Have you ever seen it? No, I haven't. Oh my goodness. It is my favorite movie. I can watch it over and over. Okay. It's on Netflix. Okay. Someone Great with um Gita Rodriguez. She's so great. Okay. Um, so it basically kind of tells the story of this woman who gets in a relationship very young. She was like in college, she met her boyfriend in college. Um, they were together for about eight years, and they she decided um to come from New York to San Francisco for a job opportunity, which was her dream job.
Speaker 10: 35:23
Okay.
Speaker 9: 35:24
And because of that, her boyfriend didn't want to continue the relationship. So it kind of goes through the hardships of moving on, letting go of you know, someone that you thought you were gonna spend the rest of your life with. Um and oh my gosh, the self-growth, the funniness of that movie. Um thankfully, she had two best friends in the movie that kind of you know helped her realize that this growth is. You might have, it's it's really popular and it's so good. I think I watched. I think I watched Lizo. It's like three best friends. Yes, okay, when you said the best friends, I was like, I think it's I think I just didn't remember that. Oh my god. You know the Lizzo song, um, The Truth Heard? Yes. Yes, okay. That's where that it came famous off that movie. I think I've watched this, but it's been a while. Okay, I'm glad you're refreshing my memory. It is so good, and just like watching it, yeah, especially at this age that I am right now, it's very, you know, makes me realize, you know, things only happen for right now, and it's not gonna affect my life moving forward. Because at the end of the day, like I'll always have myself, and as long as I can love myself, I'll be good. But that movie just makes me cry all the time because there's this one poem that she writes because she's a writer, um, on the train over to I guess like let the her relationship go. And it's just very inspirational of you know, like we may shatter because we're made of glass, but when you let the light in, the glass will shimmer, and I think that is such a good like quote because I'm like at the end of the day, you know, bad things may happen, it's life, but it's what you make yourself of it and come up from it, is the most important part. Yeah, so that is my go-to movie. So funny, so touching it. I really do.
Speaker 3: 37:14
Jimmy Rodriguez, I love oh my god, what was that one show that she was in? Jane the Virgin? Jane the Virgin, oh my god. I never finished it, but I I think I read it on Wikipedia because I was like, I need to know how this ended, but like it just kept going. I was like, It was long. I gave Telenovella bars. Yes. I'm like, is this ever gonna end?
Speaker 9: 37:29
Yeah, but oh my gosh, it's so good. Yeah. Speaking of that Jane the Virgin show, it has one of the greatest, well, for me, yeah, wedding songs in it by Bruno Mars. Which one knows that? It's not released, but it's like a song on the show. And he never released it as a song. He never released it. I was so mad because I'm like, this is literally my wedding song. But she gets married to like the police officer that she was dating. Oh but he like makes a surprise performance at the wedding. I don't remember that. It's so it's so you need to look it up. I'm gonna look it up. It's so I'm like, get ready, boyfriend. We're gonna dance into this. I got the song ready. I'm already thinking ahead. We're not even together, but we're already ahead.
unknown: 38:08
Oh my god.
Speaker 9: 38:10
Oh, that's so good. But yeah, definitely for sure recommend that movie. But yeah, that's what make always makes me cry. Never fails. I love that. I'm like, if I just need a cool, yeah, really good ride. And I do like it.
Speaker 3: 38:23
I always love coming back to like the same movies. I know it's boring. I know it's boring, but like I love rewashing.
Speaker 9: 38:32
Yes, like what you're gonna Why indulge in anything else if you know that's gonna do it for you? I'm like, I can say that with like all the other kids' movies that I grew up on. I'm like, literally, yeah. That's that's that's my movie. What am I gonna do? Are you gonna do watch something new? Yeah, why are you gonna change myself for the show? Take me for who I am. Yeah. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 3: 38:51
Well, thank you so much for sharing.
Speaker 9: 38:54
I appreciate it.
Speaker 3: 39:00
All right, welcome to BRB Crying. Thanks for having me. Do you want to talk about who you are and what made you cry?
Speaker 10: 39:07
Sure. My name is Alexa. Um recently I started um coaching at my son's T-ball. And we had our last game, and I was getting kind of emotional. And I didn't think I would be emotional because it's like T-ball. Yeah, it's like five-year-olds. But I think it was like their last game, and I'm like in charge of the dugout, so every time someone would uh get ready to bat, I would be standing with them and be talking with them, and like when it was their last time to bat, I was just like, oh my god, like they're never gonna be this small at this age, this impressionable, this and so I'm just like, you can do it, you got this. Like and then like when they would bat, and then you can see in their face, they were so excited, and then like it was our last time feeling afterwards, and then like we were walking back to the dugout and they were just cheering, and I was just like, oh my god, these cuties, they're so pure. Yes, yeah. I think that's it. Yeah. And I think what was really emotional about it too was that um I got to play a part in their lives. Like some of them, this was their first time at organized sports. And I've never played baseball, but I got recruited to join and help teach, and what better way to learn as like what a five-year-old would learn. Yeah. Um but like when I was there and sitting with them and like cheering with them and learning with them. I don't know, I just felt like what a privilege.
Speaker 3: 40:47
Yeah, it is a big deal to be someone who is entrusted with that. And like you have no idea too who might remember you like 10 years or now like, oh man, like I had this coach, and like that's true. Yeah.
Speaker 10: 41:02
Yeah, and at the end, um, one of the parents organized like a little ball, like tennis, not tennis balls, a little baseball from each of the tennis. Or two gave you a tennis ball. My other child was playing tennis, so I have the tennis mom hat on. But um I saw them signing the baseball. And I was just like, oh, I wish I could have one. Yeah. And then at the end they gave me one. It was yours. They gave me a little tennis ball, baseball book. They gave me a little baseball, and they had all of their signatures and their I mean, they can't really sign a name, but just like, you know, their block letters of their name. And it was it was the cutest thing, and I was just like, oh.
Speaker 3: 41:45
Wow. I love that you went into it kind of mealing, uh, T-ball, whatever, but like it it left an impression like that on you.
Speaker 10: 41:53
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And I mean it was such a rewarding and fulfilling experience for myself. Yeah, you know, selfishly.
Speaker 3: 42:01
Yeah. Who cares about the kids?
Speaker 10: 42:06
Yeah, it it was it was pretty profound. And I think I'd do it again.
Speaker 3: 42:10
Wow, wow. Coach Alexa. Okay. Don't make any promises. Uh thank you for sharing. Yeah, thanks for having me.
Speaker 10: 42:19
Where can people find you? Um, so I can be found at curated cultura, and that is my uh business where I curate items from different B I P O C businesses, and I curate events too where this is happening. Um and then my uh Instagram is at ForLittle Alexa. Cool. Yeah. Thanks.
Speaker 3: 42:49
Okay, so welcome to BRB Crying. Thank you. Do you want to tell us who you are and what made you cry?
Speaker 12: 42:57
Um, my name is Jem and I'm a doula, and I don't usually cry during births anymore. Oh, did you used to? Yeah, I did. It was just like, you know, a lot of emotion. Yeah. Yeah, but watching like my best friend.
Speaker 3: 43:12
I was like, wow. Oh, were you having her doula?
Speaker 12: 43:15
Yeah. Wow, oh my god, that's so special. Yeah. Just knowing them since we were like maybe six and just watching their family grow. Like, uh Yeah.
Speaker 3: 43:28
Can I ask how you got into being a doula?
Speaker 12: 43:31
Yeah, I well I I started with child development. So I was always working with children. Okay. Um I didn't know what to study in college, so I went with what I was good at. Mm-hmm. So yeah, and I really I really liked how people learn and how babies learn versus like what you're like the subject you're learning. Cause you kind of have to mold your yourself. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Um so I did that, but then after I graduated I realized I don't like being In a school. Yeah. Like I kind of feel trapped. Yeah. And it's it's beautiful to introduce children to like life. Yeah.
unknown: 44:08
Yeah.
Speaker 12: 44:09
But I think just like, you know, the coworkers and just you're in the same space. Yeah. Yeah, it was not really working. And then a mom found me on my babysitting profile and asked me to be a mother's helper. I was like, oh okay, like I could probably do that. I'm good with kids. I could help a mom out. And then I was like, you know, doing dishes or like helping around the house, and I kind of felt kind of like a maid. But then like our relationship slowly growing, um, and kind of seeing like what it is to be what a first-time mom goes through the postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety that like they can't even name. Yeah. And like from someone on the outside of that, I didn't really know until like we had the hard conversations of like, oh well, I'm good at this, so I can help you do that, but honoring their time and allowing them to experience like and move through things the first time on their own. Yeah. Um, and like maybe having a support behind you, you know, it's like it's kind of similar to working with kids, like yeah, supporting their first steps, but you can't do it for them. So like giving them the chance to experience things and just being there really helps support that to do things in their own time.
Speaker 3: 45:22
And so do you feel like that's what you take into your dual work?
Speaker 12: 45:26
Yes, yeah. Um a lot of people think like we take over for the partners, or like we have like are you you're a postpartum duo specifically, or are you like all stages? Yeah, birth and postpartum. Cool. Yeah. I did like love postpartum, yeah, and then I found like a lot of things happen during birth and like to fill in the gaps or maybe to try to get ahead of that or prepare them a bit more and then have agency and autonomy over what's happening. Um, even though like it still can go any which way, but at least grounding them into the experience helps them like at least have it be theirs.
Speaker 3: 46:04
Yeah, that's so cool. I I feel like when I was looking for a doula, I didn't really know anyone else who had had a doula, and so I was like kind of blindly going out there, but it's so cool to know that like you exist and like you know you're in the community and stuff like that too.
Speaker 12: 46:21
So I love that, and there's so many different doulas. I feel like you can have whatever niche. Like, I just so happened to work with kids and I didn't realize that was going to help me because um I think parents are kind of scared at first, yeah, and then if they can trust someone with their kids, and I think that kind of helps them with their their guard down. But like there's um birth workers who are like astrologers, who are massage therapists, um that's so cool, child birth educators, so it's kind of daunting at first because you feel like you have to take every training. Yeah, I think like grounding into yourself and what you already like have within you, and if you feel called, and I don't have children, so yeah, that was some like imposter syndrome I had to like work through too. So, like, how do I fit into it?
Speaker 3: 47:06
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is there a specific instance or like a cry recommendation that you might have for someone?
Speaker 12: 47:12
That's so funny because I cry a lot. Oh yeah, yes, but I can't like think of it right now because it's just constant, because you're just always crying about everything. But I also think like maybe because the channel's open, like that's it's just like a normal like thing. I I am able to release it. Yeah, and I think before becoming a doula, I was always like crying and absorbing things. But because you know, I'm like working with a client and it's their experience, I kind of had to learn how to not control it, but like so you're not absorbing every single thing. Yeah. I think that helped me maybe that I know my avenue now. Yeah, like I can cry within good reason, I guess.
Speaker 3: 47:53
Yeah, and then before this, you were just telling me that you are a Pisces moon. Yes. So in the eighth house. In the eighth house. Okay, tell it to what does that mean?
Speaker 12: 48:04
I think that represents like death a lot. So interesting. Yeah. And then it it's to the 29th degrees. Oh my god, I'm not girl, what's happening? What? Yeah. Are you an astrologer? Like no, no, no. I got my birth chart read a couple times. Like I had to go to like real reputable ones to to find out. But like no understanding myself and knowing like maybe my my place in like my life's mission helped me further delve into like the doula hood, I guess. I love that. Yeah. And use my powers for good. Oh, I love that. And just like that, maybe like transformation. So, like the emotional transformation for motherhood, that's yeah, where it'll happen. And like maybe crying like helps us get there. Yeah, love that.
Speaker 3: 48:51
Wow, thank you for sharing.
Speaker 12: 48:52
Do you want to tell everyone where they can find you online? Yes. Birth of the Divine on Instagram.
Speaker 3: 48:58
I love that. Yeah.
Speaker 12: 48:59
Inspired by the birth of Venus.
Speaker 3: 49:01
Oh my gosh. Are you sure you're not an astrologer? No, that I was.
Speaker 12: 49:09
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 2: 49:17
So. What do you think? You can write that in your Apple review. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 3: 49:22
What do you think?
Speaker 2: 49:22
Yeah. Five stars only, actually, we should really clarify.
Speaker 3: 49:25
But actually, I was looking into it and we actually can't say that. Um, we're supposed to say, leave us an honest review.
Speaker 2: 49:33
She's winking. If you can't hear the wink, I'll add a sound bite.
Speaker 3: 49:40
Honest review, please. Anyway, yeah, so uh what'd you think? Hope you enjoyed that. I again so much fun doing that. Uh it was personally a little bit exhausting afterwards. I was like, whoa, I'm I'm spent.
Speaker 2: 50:00
But I can't wait to do that again. Yeah, it was really fun. And thank you. Shout out to every single one of you brave souls that got featured on our show. We hope that you enjoyed recapping that magical conversation.
Speaker 3: 50:16
Yes, I hope you don't cringe. Listen, I know that there are so many times where people are like, I know I was featured, but I can't listen. So I hope you can look back on it fondly because each of those conversations was so special.
Speaker 2: 50:29
Yeah. Take yourself out of it and just look at it from a third person perspective and just witness your magic. Okay. All right. Well, that's our show for today. That's all we got. That's all we got for today. We got a lot more stuff coming up. Oh, do we? Like we mentioned before, every episode is just so special. So you gotta follow us to stay in the know. And you gotta review us to stay in our good graces. All right, we're wrapping it up. Love you. Love ya. Talk to you later. TTYL. But until then, BRB crying.
Until next time…brb crying :’)